I revamped the blog.
After recently seeing a spike in followers (thank you all), I thought it needed just a little bit of a face lift. I sat down with a pen and paper (because I still prefer pen & paper) and figured out all the things I love – people, passion, food, creativity, and matters of the heart. But before I get started on any of those things, I think it is important that you know where this blog began.
This blog began somewhere in the middle of my story – positioned somewhere between prayer, an enormous life change, and a very large glass of red wine. Not so many years ago, I asked God for a life that challenged me. A life that caused me to love deeper, that opened my eyes, that took me out of my comfort zone, that made me a better giver and doer, that made me understand people better. I asked for a life that allowed me the ability to give the best of myself to people who needed it. I asked these things, sometimes selfishly, aware that there was so much I didn’t know, thinking exposure to others would make me the person I so desperately envisioned myself to be; sometimes earnestly, convicted to be a problem solver in a world with so much turmoil that I believed I could help; sometimes fearfully, because it was a life I knew I was headed for, despite the fact I was afraid of the adjustments it would require of me.
A few years later I would come to find I was mad at God for not giving me the life I had asked for. I had expected the life I had asked for to take me over-seas, to some remote village somewhere poor, to a place where it was unlikely my skin looked like anyone elses. Many would call that the ‘white savior’ mentality, and they probably aren’t wrong, but I think at that time in my life, I simply had a narrow minded idea of what outreach and impactful change and need and blessings really are. How simple minded to think I would have to go far, far away to have my eyes opened.
The funny thing is, I didn’t even have to leave my home country to find the things I had asked for. How little I knew back then.
It would take a handful of interactions in my life to realize, God gave me exactly what I had asked for, for so many years. I asked for a life that caused me to love deeper, and he put me in a position where I directly handled people in extreme need every day, to the point it sometimes became hard to see. It broke my heart in the best of ways. I asked for a life that opened my eyes, and I was made the mentor of a child with holes in his shoes he had cut out himself. I asked for a life that took me out of my comfort zone, and after a lifetime of living in a city, I was moved to the middle of nowhere. I asked for a life that made me a better giver and doer, and I became a philanthropist, with a job on the side teaching. I asked for a life that gave me the ability to give my best to those who need it, and so I went forth living my transient life, a life that is literally all over the place all the time, doing the best I can to love those around me during the time I am with them, one day picking up a pen, and giving bits of my heart and experience to you here on this blog. Despite my doubts about my ability to run a successful blog at all, I found that the responses I was getting to my work were words of feeling understood, and words of feeling ‘not alone,’ and messages that stated the reader had learned something new from reading about my journey. And to me, there is nothing better than that, so I keep writing.
This is the best, worst, and most humorous parts of my day-to-day life. May my stories about eating crickets, finding pants in odd places, and carrying ashes, bring you love, joy, peace, and most importantly, may it make you feel more divinely connected to the other imperfect people around you.
If you love what I write, please feel free to share my work.
All my Love,